Faith is a tricky word. For me, I have to bring Great Question to the word faith, because it’s not, traditionally in Western religion when we think of faith, like faith in God, faith in some supernatural thing or experience outside of ourselves.

Faith in Buddhism has nothing to do with anything outside of ourselves. It does not necessarily have to do with something supernatural or esoteric. In a sense, it’s faith in our own true nature. It’s faith in a sense that if I can be willing to let go of that certainty. And if I am willing to have the courage to meet the moment, something authentic, real and natural can emerge. Something that I may not understand. Something that may look nothing like I may expect. But there’s a faith that if I just continue on, true nature will reveal itself. It’s already present in all things. In the sense, you can say it’s faith that using great question and great courage is enough. Not needing the certainty of an answer, but trusting the question.

The teaching is so prevalent. The guiding wisdom is all around us. All we have to do is listen.  Zen Master Sueng Sahn used to say “try, try, try for 10,000 years non-stop.”

10,000 years non-stop means forever.  Forever means right now.  10,000 years is too long.  But right now, it’s possible.

Right now, what more do you need?

Great Effort. I think of that as the hinge-point of our practice. If we don’t have this great effort, then we really don’t have a practice. Because unless we bring our practice to the difficult parts of our lives, it’s not much of a practice. And in fact, what often seems to happen is many people will practice when things get difficult in their life, but as soon as things start to get better then they don’t feel like they need it anymore. And so in a sense for a Zen practice, great effort really needs to be applied when things are going well, because that’s the time it’s easy to fall asleep. When we’re suffering it’s easy to keep this great question, “What am I? What is this life about?” But when things are going well, we can get very complacent. Zen Master Seung Sahn used to say, “A good situation is really a bad situation, and a bad situation is really a good situation.” And this is in a sense what that means. If things are going well, you can easily lose your direction. You can easily fall into selfishness and self-centeredness. But when things are difficult, then you have to call into question all your different assumptions and your different beliefs and ideas.

So many of us hate the idea of the First Noble truth, life is suffering. I often hear complaints that ask, what about joy and love and connection. Of course these things exist in our lives. And of course they do not deny the fundamental truth that suffering marks the conditions of our lives. Even in the first blush of love there is fear and longing. Within the greatest joy of our greatest fulfillment is the anxiety of loss or incompleteness. How often have we said to ourselves, is that all there is?

Suffering as an experience can range from minor irritation, like our unhappiness with the weather, to the stark shadow of our impending death. We can say that suffering permeates our subjective view of our life. This is a very important point. Suffering is intimately connected to our view. Suffering is not in the actual moment; it is in the reflection we have about the moment. Most human beings fear death and want it to stay as far away as possible. It is so logical and makes so much sense to us to fear death that if someone does not fear death we think they are crazy. And yet, to fear death means to reflect on death. Death is death, no more no less. But, I doesn’t want to die. It is the existence of the observer, the phantom I which is created out of the accumulated thoughts and feelings we have in reflection of experience which creates the suffering.

As true as this is we also must acknowledge the universal experience of I. The human consciousness inherently (if healthy) creates this reflective I. However, that doesn’t mean this I is clear and sees things as they are. “I” is also by nature distorted by its point of view. Our view is conditioned by what we have experienced in the past and our fears about the future. Because “I” can only reflect on what it knows, it’s perspective is by definition incomplete. Therefore its judgments and decisions are based on incomplete information. In addition, the information we do have is colored by our fears, desires and anger. These hindrances play havoc with our decision making, thereby maintaining and often increasing our subjective experience of suffering.

Zen Master Bon Seong in Singapore

This talk is inspired by the life of Zen Master Seung Sahn. Through his teachings and his action he was a consistent example of authenticity. Being with him would shake the foundations of my “I, my, me” mind. Things would feel surreal; my usual evaluation and control would loosen. In it’s place would appear spontaneity and humor. He showed me how one can be committed to a vow of service to the world while at the same time completely enjoying the moment. His teaching expressed spontaneity, a moment centered life lived with the purpose of attaining true self and helping this world.

He did not push us to understand the sutras, or be experts (as he was) in the Buddha’s teaching. Rather he pushed us to attain the Buddha’s mind which means to understand our true selves and manifest it in a way that helps others. About three years before I received Inka, authorization to teach, a group of us were out to lunch with Zen Master Seung Sahn. My brother asked him: when will Jeff become a teacher. He replied: “When he learns how to eat noodles.”

This poem to me expresses the heart of his teaching.

ORIGINAL FACE
–Zen Master Seung Sahn

Your true self is always shining and free
Human beings make something and enter the ocean of suffering
Only without thinking can you return to your true self
The high mountain is always blue,white clouds coming and going

When Shakyamuni Buddha had his big awakening, he was gazing at the Eastern star. In that moment he completely realized that he and the universe were one thing. Even to say one thing takes away from the completeness of the experience. His experience was complete, no trace of I. He realized that not only were he and the universe one, but that it was true for all beings, all of us . Zen Master Mang Gong’s famous calligraphy states “The whole world is a single flower.” Just as a flower is made up of stem and petals, pistil and roots, so is the complete universe made up of parts which are themselves complete.

Your true self is always shining and free.

You are already complete. Hui Neng, the 6th Patriarch, said: You should know that so far as Buddha-nature is concerned, there is no difference between an enlightened man and an ignorant one. What makes the difference is that one realizes it, while the other is ignorant of it. The Buddha’s teaching says, without cultivation you are already complete. Our authentic, real self needs no cultivation. True self is always shining and free whether we are aware of it or not. Our task, our practice, is to become aware and to actualize our true self, to be it in this very moment.

Zen is not about self improvement. We don’t strive to become something, or to overcome our deficiencies. We practice to allow the natural, authentic unfolding of buddha-nature to manifest. Our effort is about clearing away delusion and ignorance. This means getting out of our own way, allowing this magnificence, this authentic true self to manifest. In this way healing and world peace are not an impossible distant dream, but exist right now, right here in this very moment.

Human beings make something and enter the ocean of suffering

Our true self may indeed always be shining and free but most of the time we experience painful difficulties in our lives. We are constantly dissatisfied with the ways things are. The Buddha said that we suffer because either we don’t have what we want or we are afraid of losing what we do have. Moment to moment we struggle to control and force the world to fit into the mold of our desires. That is what Zen Master Seung Sahn is pointing to when he says that human beings make something.

Listen to this sound (hit). Each of us hears this sound. Before thinking we can recognize it for what it is. Just (hit). But some of us don’t like that sound: “Why did he hit the table so hard”. Or some of us really liked it: “That is so great, I really could get the deep meaning of that sound.” Either way we are making something. The sound itself is just as it is. How I feel about it is making something. This making something creates likes and dislikes. Then, as the Buddha said, if I don’t get what I want I suffer. If I do get what I want then I am afraid I might loose it. Or, I might like this sound, but the next sound might hurt my ears and I won’t like it. We are perpetually at odds with and trying to control our reality.

In Buddhism we talk about the Three Poisons–greed, aversion and delusion. These three poisons point to the way we make something and enter the ocean of suffering. Can you recognize them in your own life? Can you see how your desire for things, or rejection of things color your perceptions and actions in the world? Can you admit to the inauthenticity of your actions driven by these three poisons?

The first poison is greed or desire. I want, I need, give it to me, please, please please I really want it. I need to get it and I need to figure out a way to get it. Maybe I can just take it. I know it is yours, but I need it more than you. And anyway, my needs are more important than yours. I’m even willing to fabricate a story in order to get what I want. And I will repeat this story over and over until I finally believe it–mostly.

Greed interrupts the natural flow of things. Adding my desire into the equation of life, trying to change or alter the way things are to bring me satisfaction, ultimately leads to suffering.

Aversion or hatred is the second poison. Aversion is essentially rejection. Get that thing away from me. Hatred and averision arise in response to something we don’t like or want to happen to us. It often leads us to push away, at worst culminating in violence. Hatred and anger can overwhelm us, causing us to act in inauthentic ways in order to get relief from these feelings. The natural,authentic flow of life is rejected and more suffering is the result.

The third poison is ignorance or delusion. This poison follows directly from the other two. Our greed and anger force us to act inauthentically and loose contact with the original, natural flow of things. This inevitably leads to a sense of separation. To live with that separation I make up a story or narrative to explain who I am and why my greed and anger are justified. More and more true self is lost and I live in the dream of my narrative. This is fundamental delusion. The more contrived our delusion is the more we suffer. The more rigid we become trying to justify and bolster our story, the more we suffer, and the more we cause suffering for those around us. This “making” of likes and dislikes, good and bad, right and wrong, leads us father and father away from an authentic, natural unfolding of our lives.

Only without thinking can we return to our true self.

Without thinking means before thinking, or not attaching to thinking. Seeing things as they are, not how we would like them to be. Decartes said “I think therefore I am”. A Zen student asks: “If I don’t think, then what?”

Before thinking is easy to talk about but difficult practice. Our desire, anger and ignorance are so powerful, so encompassing and solid that we don’t even recognize their impact. Many people who first hear about before thinking find it absurd. Others feel that it is impossible to not attach to their thinking.

This leads us to the realm of Zen practice. Though our delusion seems enormous and our suffering feels so daunting and profound, Zen practice offers us a way to deconstruct our delusion. We can live a more centered and grounded life, in order to work with our desire and anger, so that we can reconnect with that authentic natural self which is always shining and free.

Quiet the mind. Breathe gently and deeply in and out. Observe what is happening just now. Find your balance point where desire and anger don’t control you. Allow your actions in life to come from this place and mindfully pay attention to the results. This is true Zen practice.

From the Chinese and Korean Zen tradition we learn that it takes three things to practice Zen–Great Question, Great Courage and Great Faith. These three greats form the foundation of practice. Together they show us a path, a way to live which will bring us into more alignment with what is natural, authentic and true. In this way we can find our true self and help this world.

Great question is the first of the three greats. Great question means asking the question: “What am I” and “what is this”. Asking these great questions bring our meditation and mindfulness alive. As we sit in meditation, these questions brings energy and focus to our silent work. Mindfully asking these questions as we go about our everyday lives offers a way to bring our meditation out of the Dharma Hall. What is actually happening right now? What do I feel and think about it all? How are my thoughts and feelings coloring my view of what is happenning right now?

Moment to moment we are called upon to respond to all sorts of situations and conditions. How clearly can we really see what is going on? As was said in the discussion about making something, usually our view of the moment is colored by the three poisons. Using Great Question as a focus of our Zen practice, we can begin to observe the moment more honestly, more free of the biases of our desire, anger and delusion. As we let go of our biases, we can experience our lives more directly and honestly. We use these questions to clarify our life.

Great courage is the second great. Great courage means to make a great effort, whether the moment is difficult or easy. This effort is critical to Zen Practice because our delusion is so strong. Life is very uncertain and we are very vulnerable. We cling strongly to our own delusion to protect us from these risks and uncertainties. In our Zen practice we need to push beyond what is comfortable. This is one of the important lessons we learn on a meditation retreat. Much of the time during retreat we are unhappy and want it to end. Just making it through helps us build a stronger center. We need to become better able to observe our desire and anger without losing ourselves in them. I may want something, but by applying great effort , I may not need to satisfy my desire. I may be angry, but I may not need to strike out. I can watch it, observe it and not act on it. We need great courage to honestly face our feelings and thoughts as they are, so as not to be lead astray by them.

Great faith leads us back to the true self which is always shining and free. We believe in our true self, in the authentic unfolding of life. This is not about believing in something outside ourselves. We are the universe, the universe is us! As we begin to see the falseness of our own delusion we can begin to experience directly the completeness and authenticity of this moment. We can have faith in our own experience. While standing in the rain, we get wet. It is possible to believe our own senses, untainted by the three poisons. Listen to the wind. Hear it and appreciate it for what it is. Feel it on your face and you experience truth.

These three greats, practiced moment to moment, grounded in meditation and mindfulness, offer us all an active and dynamic way to practice Zen. They help us actually relax the tight grip of our feelings and thinking and return us to our true self.

The high mountain is always blue, white clouds coming and going

Here we return the realm of the natural unfolding of the universe. The mountain itself is always blue, whether we realize it or not, whether we like it or not. The clouds coming and going do not bother the mountain. In fact, they coexist peacefully. The mountain helps the clouds form and the clouds give moisture to the mountain. In the same way our struggles and triumphs nourish our awakening.

In the Tibetan Buddhist tradition, enlightenment is depicted as a two headed dragon of wisdom and compassion. In a moment of centered authenticity, wisdom and compassion appear. We have the clarity to see things as they are and the courage to open our heart. We naturally treat the world and the things in it with love and compassion and are concerned about others, not only about ourselves.

Authenticity is the path to peace and healing. Don’t try to be someone other than yourself. Allow your Zen practice to help you listen deeply to your true self-your deepest and most authentic expression of the buddha’s mind. There are 86,400 seconds in one day. Imagine how many experiences we live in all these seconds. How will we live them? Will we remain lost in the dream created by the Three Poisons, or will we wake up to this moments magnificent unfolding of Buddha nature?

Welcome to the new Empty Gate Zen Center web site. Many thanks to the development team, which worked together to make this web site appear in Virtual Space. Thanks to Leah Kenaga for her tireless dedication to the Zen Center in general and to this web site in particular. Her wonderful design sense is responsible for the elegant and creative look of the page. Ross Chapman has used his expertise as a web developer to make happen in virtual space what Leah designed in the relatively “real” space of Photoshop. Thanks also to Gary Sprague, Xuan Vu and myself for writing and creative input.

This being the first posting to my Blog I want to give you a sense of what I will write about. I am most interested in the intersection of practice and our everyday life. Our training is very important for our ability to meet this very moment directly, with wisdom and compassion. My background of dedication to Zen Practice and my training in and my work as a Psychotherapist inform my take on life. Deep and awesome states in the Dharma Room are important, but without grounding, they are, like all of our experiences, transient. Like the Buddha said, these experiences are like a phantom, a bubble, or a dewdrop. Zen practice can help develop the flexibility and aliveness to meet this very moment freshly.

My interests are varied and I hope that what I post on this blog will reflect that. I enjoy reading the news and keeping up to date so you may see me post on some of the important political and cultural issues of our times. If political, please remember that they are my views and do not reflect the views of Empty Gate Zen Center. Empty Gate is an open community. People of all political persuasions, ethnic or racial backgrounds, and temperaments are welcome to and do practice with us.

I also hope to comment on the everyday occurrences that occur in our lives. One of the valuable teachings I received from my teacher, Zen Master Seung Sahn was a deep appreciation for the absurd. We all develop a worldview, a way of getting by in a very unsettling and multilayered existence. We weave a tapestry of self, adding new strands to the old, hoping to make sense of things and not be overtaken by events or feelings that we can’t control. This creates a false sense of self, which can cause strange and uncomfortable happenings in our lives. I hope to use this blog to expose this absurdity in my life and the lives of others. A healthy sense of humor about our selves and others is critical if we hope to have a long-term Zen practice.

Last night at around 3AM my wife and I were awakened (for the third time) by our dear sweet cat. She had already disturbed our sleep enough times that we had banned her from the bedroom. On a trip to the bathroom my wife Sheridan found a dead rat on the living room floor (Kwan Sae Um Bosal). Whether our cat Sophie was punishing us or trying to get back in our good graces with her conquest we will never know. Anyway, this did not help our sleep in any way.

While trying to get back to sleep I was reflecting on how much goes on in the nocturnal world that I am not aware of. Our cat spends hours outside at night interacting with a variety of animals and insects that we never see. Seeing the dead rat on the floor was undeniable proof that there are many rats living with us on our property in Oakland California. How many of us really want to admit to the fact that we live with rats all around us. It reminded me of how many things we deny or just conveniently forget about. This denial may help us find some comfort in our world, but importantly, it holds us back from seeing things as they really are. If the Buddha made any point, he taught that seeing things clearly is the prerequisite to enlightenment. If we are not dealing honestly with the way things are we will never break the stranglehold that suffering has on our lives. Uprooting this denial and dishonesty is the path to freedom.